My life on Grindr

You may be wondering how apps like Grindr, Tinder, and Taimi all work?   See here for my review of the best apps.   There are two types of apps: Grid-based apps show a grid of guys, sorted by location - nearest to more distant, from left to right. Any  grid app allows instant contact with other users. Card-stack apps such as tinder display a stack of cards with user profiles and you then swipe left or right to indicate if you like them or not. The user cards presented are not sorted by distance, but rather in a randomized fashion. With these apps you will have to wait until the user you like also likes you before you can start chatting! Location All these apps use location  to help you find other users. Most apps will prompt you to turn on location on your phone if it's already off. The

If you have just com e out of a relationship or marriage I bet there is a lot of things you want to say to your ex-partner. A mixture of anger, regrets, sadness and sorrow all mixed into one. To try and get over your relationship you can write a letter to your ex to help you get closure and say goodbye. I tried this myself. I wrote a letter to my ex-husband. I called him all sorts of things. Cucking funt. Wh*re. Sl*t. That was just the beginning. 24 pages later, and I am still not finished. I still have things I want to say.  Will you feel better after you have done this?  Absolutely . After I did this it felt like a load was lifted from my shoulders. Thoughts I had ruminating in my mind were gone since they were no down on paper instead of being rotated in my mind. It was as if so many of my thoughts that were running through my head on a circular basis, were suddenly gone.  Maybe you never got any closure? My ex-husband discarded me. One day, he stopped communicating. You can read

Grindr has long since removed the Ethnicity Filter from its app. Still, every day there are a handful of users who are still looking for it. The search log for this article includes " grindr bring back ethnicity filter",  " dating apps that filter ethnicity" and even the somewhat questionable search term "race filter grindr".  The Ethnicity filter on Grindr let you include/exclude profiles based on their ethnicity such as Black, White and Latino. In the same search log I also spotted one person who searched for "how to find generous guys on grindr". Whoever you are - it is more likely that someone generous is a mature gentleman than a "guy" and no there is no way of searching for gentlemen with a solid bank account on Grindr. Sorry. Grindr doesn't even allow the word "generous" in the profile text. Back to the filter . Somet

I married a narcissist who had led a double life seeing another man behind my back for years. One day he just discarded me. That was five years ago and now I want to share what I learned along the way.  Lwanda and I in happier times. San Francisco, April 2017. Today it's nearly 5 years since my life was completely changed. Turned upside down. It was in the summer of 2015 I met Lwanda. You can read the whole story in my post "Help! I married a narcissist!" . The short story is that I met what I thought was a wonderful young black guy, we got together and had what I thought was a wonderful relationship which led to us marrying. I really wanted to be with him for the rest of my life. Sadly he did not and had already secured someone else behind my back and had a relationship in parallel with him for several years. I gradually found out about all of this but to this day I have not had any explanation whatsoeve

The 1999 film (now famously starring Ru Paul) "But I'm a cheerleader" portrays a girl who is your average All-American cheerleader - but also happens to like girls. "I get good grades, I go to church - I'm a cheerleader!" the main character Megan exclaims. However, following the  discovery she does in fact like girls "that way", a lot of cognitive dissonance ensues. Megan really thought she was was a certain way.  And that is also what I was thinking when, one day, I discovered I was a co-dependent. No, actually, a Co-Dependent with capital letters. This discovery completely shattered the image I had of myself and I had to re-evaluate who I really am, what made me the way I am and how I could move on with my life.  What made me end up in the therapists's comfy chair was that a few years ago  I married a guy who was clearly somewhere on the narcissistic spectrum. To my surprise I discovered that is the worst combination you could have bet